The Gory Tory Incinerator Story


more like Orcs than Hobbits, always win when YOU, the children, more like Hobbits than Orcs, foolishly vote them in.  Sour-one will get his incinerator; the Tory Borough, will get its £200,000 Blue Coat of Apparent Concern; the Tory lawyers will get fees for unsuccessfully opposing the Tories-who-want-the-incinerator on behalf of the Tories-who-don’t-want-the-incinerator; the Tory government, away in a tower of glistening blue, will get its "I wash my hands of this" moment and the incinerator will be built as far from the waste as possible! The roaring monster, Orcs-Will-celebrate-us, blue but a bit stained with waste residue into a shade of fascist brown, will get shed loads of your pennies. This may help to pay for fines in the USA. You children, more Hobbit than Orc, will get a finger in the eye, ash up the nose and dioxins and furans for breakfast! Snap, crackle and pop (that is the sound of pustules and scabs popping).

Now children, a big deep breath and think of Bopal, which was much more serious. So you needn't be frightened of a few diddy dioxins or fiddly furans. They will soon blow over (us all), but It will help your passing if we sing a nursery rhyme. No, not that daft song  “Doh a Deer…” but one specially written:  “Villains are blue, my love, Villains are blue-oo-oo, Hearts made of granite stone, With Tory writ thru!” (to the tune of, well, yes, “Violets are Blue”). Yes, Rupert you can sing with your nebuliser on…

NEXT CAMPAIGN EDITION: HOW OAPS FELL FURTHER BEHIND GREEK AND PORTUGUESE PENSIONERS, “furriners” for whose debts we pay extra taxes. Their OAPs get 80% of earnings, we get 17% of earnings (Trident max-ed our credit card?) But, first, the 16 Millionaires will now sing “We’re All in it Together”. Give us a note Mr Osborne, one, two, three….

© Vernon Moyse, 18 Rainsthorpe, Kings Lynn, PE30 3UF